FAIRVIEW PSYCHOLOGICAL SERVICES, PA
A Private Practice Established in 1989
Committed to Excellence
Dedicated to Personalized Care
Patricia Powell Hundley, MA, LPA, HSP-PA,Owner
Clinical Psychologist
Providing Quality Care Since 1987
Sexual, Physical, Emotional Abuse Issues
Fairview Psychological Services provides confidential and caring therapy for men and women to explore the impact of abuse and to begin and complete the healing process. Experience working with survivors has taught us that, no matter what kind of abuse a survivor has endured, it is the whole person who is hurt. Most survivors feel some level of guilt and responsibility for the abuse, have difficulty trusting themselves and others, have difficult relationships, low self esteem and self doubt no matter what their achievements, and continue to experience shame and embarrassment about the abuse long after it has ended. In some cases, survivors may experience disturbing and vivid memories or feelings associated with the abuse, which are unexpectedly triggered by certain people, objects, activities, or events in the present. This can be especially difficult for the survivors themselves and for their loved ones. Healing from abuse takes time to honestly acknowledge what happened, identify how these hurtful experiences affected the survivor when the abuse was happening, how the survivor is being affected today, and what is needed for personal healing and resolution. Our goal is to provide a safe, caring, and confidential setting to help survivors gain the strength and support they need to address these issues, grieve their losses, restore self esteem, and develop strategies to reclaim forgotten potential. Top
Separation & Divorce - Prevention & Recovery - Couples Counseling
Couples who are married or in an otherwise long-term, committed relationship make that commitment with a loving partnership, not conflict and disappointment, in mind. Unfortunately, couples sometimes lose sight of their relationship dreams and goals, and instead find themselves filled with stress, anger, and resentment and on the brink of separation or divorce. Healing a troubled relationship is hard work, but ending a relationship and starting over is painfully hard, too. At FPS our goal is to help partners learn to handle difficulties more creatively, find forgiveness for past hurts, develop healthier relationship skills, improve communication, find friendship, ignite their sexual relationship, and begin to re-create a healthier and more satisfying life together. Top
If the Relationship Has Already Ended....
When clients call for our services after a relationship has ended, we offer assistance and emotional support in working through the grief that accompanies their loss. We encourage an honest look at both their partner's and their own contribution to the failed relationship, and an honest look at their entire relationship history. Our goal in looking back is to identify specific behaviors, skill deficits, or patterns in relationship choices that may need attention in therapy. Our ultimate goal is to help our clients obtain the necessary self knowledge and skills to avoid old relationship pitfalls, to be a healthy partner themselves, and to make wiser relationship decisions that will help create a happy and enduring relationship future. Top
If there is Infidelity....
Whether or not a relationship has ended, infidelity is an especially difficult issue to face. It can reawaken underlying questions of self esteem and self worth in the victimized partner, and can sometimes damage a relationship to the point that it is beyond repair. At FPS we work with individuals who have been victimized by an affair, partners who have been involved in an affair themselves, and couples who are working together to save their relationship after an affair has been discovered. Whether we are working with an individual or a couple, it is extremely important that the person who has been hurt by a partner's unfaithfulness take the necessary time in therapy to grieve the affair and its associated losses. It is equally important that therapy goals focus on helping the individual or couple determine what is needed to avoid finding themselves in a similar future situation. Therapy goals may also need to address other issues that are often associated with infidelity such as substance abuse or addictions, family or origin issues, co-dependency, anger management, depression and anxiety, and a personal history of trauma, especially in situations where there has been a series of affairs or other types of betrayals in the relationship. Top
Co-Dependency & Other Relationship Issues
Co-dependency involves painful worry or fear about another person's behavior or well-being that goes beyond healthy concern. The intensity of these feelings is sometimes so strong that controlling the other person's behavior becomes a major focus of the co-dependent person's life. Co-dependent behavior is mostly motivated by good intentions and usually involves trying to get a loved one to make changes that would be in their own best interest. Unfortunately for all involved, the result is almost always just the opposite of what was intended. Whether the person is a child or adult, inside or outside the family, male or female, the outcome is the same - frustration, anger, blame, conflict, and finally feeling powerless and out of control. At FPS we work with clients to identify their co-dependent behaviors, eliminate unhealthy relationship patterns, and develop healthy expectations for themselves and others. Working on co-dependent behavior is often a part of therapy with clients who have a history of abuse, family of origin issues, marital or couple's problems, addictions or other compulsive behaviors, and other issues that involve troubled relationships. Top
Stress Management - Life, Work, Family
Teaching effective ways to manage stress is a part of virtually every client's therapy at FPS. When clients are unable to effectively resolve or cope with the difficult situations in their lives, the result can be uncomfortable emotional and physical symptoms. At FPS, our goal is to encourage our clients to clearly identify the sources of their stress and its effect on their quality of life, and then to develop a plan of action specific to their situation. More detail about specific sources of stress can be found in the descriptions of our other specialty areas. Top
Anger Management
FPS has seen an increase in calls for help with managing out-of-control anger in the past few years. Callers often describe feelings of chronic impatience and frustration, with frequent lashing out at family, friends, co-workers, and even strangers. Persons with anger management difficulties often experience much guilt and shame over their behavior, make apologies and promises to do better, and suffer themselves through white-knuckle attempts to avoid repeating the cycle again. At FPS we offer individual, couple, and family therapy to assist in changing this relationship-damaging behavior. Therapy focuses on personal accountability and responsibility for inappropriate or abusive actions, and learning new coping strategies and respectful ways of responding to others. We use cognitive-behavioral and insight approaches that help our clients improve self-restraint and self-monitoring, increase their empathy for others, learn to respectfully settle conflicts, and examine and resolve core issues that are often at the root of poor anger management skills. Top
Alcohol or Drug Abuse, Addictions, & Other Compulsive Behaviors
Substance abuse or other behaviors practiced in excess can be extremely harmful to the person involved in these behaviors, and to their relationships with family members and friends. Careers can be lost, health can be ruined, and the overall quality of their own life, and the quality of life for those around them, can be severely compromised. At FPS, individual, couple, and family therapy, as well as support groups or group therapy, are often employed in some combination to treat out of control and destructive behaviors. If more intensive treatment is needed for those who have become dependent on alcohol or drugs, referral to a structured in-house program at area substance abuse clinics is available. In addition to alcohol or drug abuse, examples of behaviors that can become compulsive and damaging include gambling, spending, overeating, internet activity, sex, pornography, or erotica; or too much time spent engaged in exercise, work, hobbies, or other activities that would be considered healthy for almost everyone when practiced in moderation. If the person engaging a destructive behavior is not willing to seek help personally, it is vitally important that those affected by the behavior seek help for themselves. Top
Adult Children of Alcoholic (ACOA) & Other Family of Origin Issues
Family of origin issues refer to present day difficulties that are associated in some way with harmful childhood family experiences. Some examples of these harmful environments are homes where a parent or guardian abuses alcohol or drugs; is addicted to activities such as spending, gambling, or sex; is angry, overly controlling, abusive, or violent in any way; is physically absent or suffering from a debilitating physical or mental illness; or is simply experiencing so much personal turmoil that there is failure to provide a loving and nurturing home environment. At FPS our goal in working with any family of origin issue is to help our clients understand and identify how growing up in these environments has shaped their view of themselves and the world around them. Therapy can help identify the negative impact of these family experiences, facilitate healing, and improve current personal, family, and professional relationships. Of special importance, therapy can help clients avoid repeating the unwanted family patterns of their own childhood, and instead provide a nurturing and loving environment in their present home. Top
Depression
Almost everyone has experienced an occasional depressed mood that lasts for short periods of time. Usually the mood lifts after a few hours or days; and life returns to normal without the need for professional help. We become concerned that a person is clinically depressed when the depressed mood continues for a longer period of time and begins to interfere with the person's quality of life or their ability to handle usual responsibilities. When clinically depressed, a person may experience crying episodes, difficulty sleeping or sleeping too much, weight loss or weight gain, anxiety or panic, increased anger or irritability, feelings of guilt, sexual difficulties, loss of interest in previously enjoyed activities, thoughts of death or dying, and thoughts or plans of self harm or suicide. Depression usually responds well to treatment, which may include both medication and psychotherapy. Many persons who are depressed do not want to use medication as a first approach to symptom relief; and we agree that medication is not always a necessary or superior treatment for depression. Especially when symptoms are mild to moderate, cognitive-behavioral therapy, along with techniques to manage life stress, often provides relief from symptoms and a return to normal functioning. In more severe cases of depression, medication, in addition to therapy, may be required for adequate symptom relief. Chronic or recurrent episodes of depression are frequently associated with a history of trauma, abuse, or other family of origin issues. If this applies, please look for additional information under other the appropriate specialty areas. Top
Anxiety Disorders & Panic
The sudden onset of a pounding, racing heartbeat, chest discomfort, sweaty palms, blurred vision, difficulty swallowing, dry mouth, dizziness, tingling hands, weakness, fear of dying or losing control - these are a few of the frightening symptoms of someone experiencing a panic attack. These feelings can come on unexpectedly without warning, or predictably in a specific situation or circumstance. They can range from mild discomfort to paralyzing fear and can disrupt a person's life to the point that they are unable to even leave their home. Treatment for mild to moderate anxiety and panic usually involves relaxation training, stress management techniques, and cognitive-behavioral therapy. More severe symptoms may require treatment with medication, at least temporarily, for adequate relief. Chronic anxiety symptoms are also frequently associated with a history of trauma, abuse, or other family of origin issues. If this applies, please look for additional information under the appropriate specialty areas. Top
Issues of Grief, Loss, & Bereavement
Grief and bereavement describe the process of coming to terms with the loss of someone or something we care deeply about. At FPS, we assist clients who are coping with the death of close family members or loved ones, as well as those who are facing the aftermath of painful events in their own lives or in the lives of those they love. Grief work is also an important part of therapy for adult survivors of childhood abuse or neglect and for those recovering from more recent trauma or threats to safety experienced in adulthood. When any major loss is the focus of therapy, our goal is to provide a safe and compassionate atmosphere for our clients to work through the painful emotions and unanswered questions that can oftem seem overwhelming. We assist our clients through compassionate listening, and through interactive conversations that can help with intense emotions that may be confusing and difficult to understand. We also actively work with our clients to help them evaluate any feelings of responsibility or guilt and remorse toward their loss. Experience with our clients has taught us that grief, when interrupted or hindered, can result in painful emotions that go unresolved for years. When this is the case, our goal is to work supportively with our clients to help them identify and remove blocks to grieving, and then to assist them as they work toward personal healing and resolution. Specific losses, in addition to the death of a loved one, that our clients often work through in therapy include relationship betrayal, divorce or separatrion, estrangement from family or friends, loss of status or reputation, life-altering disappointment in self or others, serious or life-threatening health issues, and the loss of a beloved pet. Top
Life Transitions, Including Issues of Guilt, Remorse & Regret
Major changes in life can show up in many forms, from familiar developmental stages and rites of passage, to those times when an unexpected turn of events forces a person to face circumstances that are unwelcome and unknown. When facing major change, successful transition is dependent upon the physical, behavioral, emotional, and sometimes spiritual adjustments that are necessary in order to make sense out of a difficult or painful life event. For some of our clients the most challenging blocks to making these adjustments are feelings of guilt, remorse, or regret over missed opportunities that have been swept away by the change itself. At FPS we provide a safe and caring environment for our clients to examine the personal impact of life-altering changes they must face, and to recover from any losses that accompany the change. We also assist them in identifying and making the necessary adjustments for successful transition to their new set of life circumstances. More information on therapy addressing the Loss and Grief aspects of life transitions can be found under the heading Loss, Grief, & Bereavement. Top
Self Esteem Issues
Low self esteem and feelings of self doubt are common complaints in therapy, and work on these issues is included when clients seek treatment in many of our other specialty areas. Most clients are surprised to find that a major way they hold onto their negative self image and feelings of low self worth is by using a higher standard in evaluating themselves than they use when evaluating others. For some clients, the reverse is true; and they tend to see others in a more negative light than they see themselves, which often results in chronic feelings of anger or victimization. While our approach may vary according to the specific reasons for seeking therapy, our goal is to help clients evaluate their own thoughts and actions through the same lens they use for others. As this ability develops, clients experience increased self esteem and feelings of self worth, an increased sense of competency, and greater enjoyment as their relationships with others improve. Top
Gay & Lesbian Issues
At FPS, as is true in any therapeutic setting, many of the concerns our clients bring to therapy are not influenced by their sexual orientation. However, there are certain issues, specific to our gay and lesbian clients, that will typically be the focus of at least a part of their work in therapy. Some of these issues involve learning healthy ways to cope with disrespectful or stereotypical remarks, jokes, references, and discrimination still found in some work and social settings; confusion and fear about the aftermath of disclosure to family, friends, or co-workers; coming to terms with judgmental opinions from religious leaders and others in positions of authority, especially when those opinioins have been echoed by family members and friends; a sense of guilt that may be associated with parental wishes and expectations that won't be met; and finding healthy ways to manage the stress of living a compartmentalized life, which is often the case before sexual orientation has been disclosed. Also, for our gay couples in long-term relationships, there may be difficulties that go beyond the usual challenges of getting to know, and becoming a part of, a life partner's family. This can be especially true when there is open disclosure and acceptance in the family of one partner, and secrecy and threat of rejection in the family of the other. For our clients considering a prepared disclosure of their sexual orientation to family members or to persons in other social settings, we offer assistance in evaluating their readiness, and then work closely with them throughout the disclosure process. Top
Step Parenting - Blended Families
At FPS many of our clients have experienced the challenging adjustments that are a necessary part of creating a healthy blended family. Experience has shown us that the relationship between step parent and step child is especially sensitive to the stress of incorporating new members into the family. In working with these issues, we offer individual, couple, and family therapy, depending on the needs of a specific family and its members. Our goal is to assist our clients and their families in successfully negotiating their new relationships by developing improved communication and conflict resolution skills, exploring and resolving questions of loyalty, grieving losses associated with family members who are no longer living together, and facilitating compatibility among all members of the blended family. Top
Communication & Conflict Resolution Skills
Being able to communicate effectively is a vital skill in maintaining healthy relationships among family members, friends, and co-workers. At FPS, our goal is to help our clients improve their relationships by working on important skills like showing respect to others, even when feeling angry, and trading in habits of fault-finding and blame in favor of solving conflicts through cooperative negotiation and compromise. We assist clients in learning to hold themselves and others compassionately accountable for what is said, even when they feel anger or other intense emotions, or when they are in conversations that involve subjects that are painful or difficult to talk about. Even though changing old patterns of communication may require hard work and persistence, the improvement in relationships can be well worth the time and effort it takes to change. Because of the importance of effective communication and conflict resolution, these skills are addressed to some degree in our work with almost every client. Top
Women's Issues & Women in Transition
While gender may not always be an important aspect of issues our clients bring to therapy, there are certain life experiences that are specific to being a woman and that many women feel are easier to discuss with, and better understood by, another woman. Some examples we hear about from our clients include the challenges of motherhood and the choice women sometimes feel they must make between having a career or family, or the difficulty and sacrifices when they have chosen to manage both. Other issues specific to women we see in therapy involve adjustments to life's beginnings and endings, including marriage or divorce, children being born or leaving home, and the physical, emotional, and sometimes spiritual challenges that can occur during mid-life. In much of our work with women's issues, we find women need help in identifying and changing a familiar and unhealthy way of relating within their families, work, and other social situations. That familiar relationship tendency is to put their own needs last, which over time can lead to depression, burn out, resentment, and questioning the meaning and purpose of life and the life choices they have made. Whatever the issues or transition a woman may bring to therapy, our goal at FPS is to assist her in exploring life's challenges from a feminine perspective of compassion, respect, equality, and strength in a treatment setting that addresses the needs of mind, body, and spirit. Top
Spiritual Growth or Religious Questioning
Beginning in the mid 1990's FPS began to see an increasing number of clients expressing a desire to address spiritual or religious issues as a part of their work in therapy; and we welcomed the opportunity to incorporate these needs into their therapy goals. As this area of our practice grows, we find that many of our clients who wish to focus on spirituality are actively questioning the religious teachings of their childhood and feel there is no place, other than a trusted therapy relationship, where they can freely and safely discuss their doubts or concerns. Others are seeking support and feedback as they explore non-traditional spiritual ideas that are different from the teaching and practices of Western churches. Still others express a desire to actively use principles of their familiar faith tradition as they work through the issues that have brought them into therapy. At FPS, when our clients are working on issues of spirituality, our goal is to meet them where they are in their spiritual journey, to listen without judgment to their questions and concerns, and to assist them in finding the resources they need for exploring and identifying their own spiritual truth. Top
1973 J. N. Pease Place, Suite 201
Charlotte, NC 28262
Phone (704) 362-2618
E-mail fairviewpsych@msn.com
